Twitter

117 replies · 20,689 views

over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Twitter

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Now I have only just started to actually use Facebook a bit recently although I am still struggling slightly to understand why people I knew in school think I care that they are "having some coffee - lol". I don't drink coffee but I just cannot see how it is that amusing.

But can someone please try to explain Twitter to me? I have tried to have this conversation (in real life) with people but am yet to see any actual point to it. It just seems like Facebook but with less spelling and grammar - now I can get updates from people that I went to school with that they are "havin sum cofee lol".

Why would I go on Twitter? Who would really follow me, and would they be the saddest people on the planet? Who would I follow, apart from Rio Ferdinand and Robbie Savage? Do I really care what either Robbie Savage or Rio Ferdinand are doing all the time?

As my 4th girlfriend will testify to, I am a pretty adventurous guy so convince me I will enjoy it.

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

oh, and the reason I thinking about Twitter at the moment is because of this brilliant story:

Welcome To Twitter
Talking of Twitter, it was quite an entrance from Leicester City striker Paul Gallagher on Monday night.

'Hello, Im just getting to grips with this twitter lark, thanks for all the messages - get ready for the banter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' was his first, innocent tweet.

But then....

'Off to bed to smash @HayleyGa11agher back doors in ,,'

and just minutes later...

'I'm back ,, head like a traffic light ,, RED haha .'

The response from wife Hayley Gallagher? 'Good lord what have I done introducing him to this!'

Mind you, she should probably save most her shame for her mother, who re-tweeted her son-in-law's intention to smash her daughter's doors in with an added 'HA HA HA'. Charming.

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Your second post answers the question posed in your first: twitter is a very useful way of keeping up with the latest info from sports stars (not that he'd qualify as one) etc.

You can obviously use twitter in a number of ways but I use it primarily to follow people of interest to me, barely ever post myself and when I do it is typically an @mention to someone I know irl.

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

use it to stalk and harass B and C list celebrities.

Central Hawkes Bay Nix
and tragic follower of Charlton Athletic

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

I pity anyone who follows me on twitter as I mostly use it to retweet stuff to win things lol. But I follow quite a few local bars and hotels etc as you can get good deals and I found it really interesting following some of the main cyclists and commentators during the tour'd'france as you got extra titbits like that it might have taken them 4hrs on a bus to get back to their hotel once the race finished

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Most of those who follow me are YF or spambots.

Its kind of useful to have some of you on here, then can have friends exclusively on facebook.

Its just something different to talk with others, ande very useful for up to date information. It was brilliant when the chch earthquake happened for example. Or when I was at work during the sevens, I could see the #sevens trend and have a laugh at some of the costumes wandering about town.

Its mostly just another tool to kill time, to be honest.

Allegedly

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

I mainly use it to notify Nighthawks of scores, cancelleations etc. Occassionally to bait my workmates and z-Grade footballing 'celebs' - I'm looking at you Gourdie :-)

How's my driving? - Whine here

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

I use twitter for all sorts now. I admit I had reservations about it to start with. (What could you do with 140 chars...)

Started to use it when I stayed up a night to follow the events in Egypt. All sorts of people were using it all around Cairo. At first I thought these people could be anybody but finally got the wheat sorted from the chaff.

dairyflat2011-07-27 19:45:11

Profile pic. Should you be interested. Lakhsen, on the right, lost touch with him.
Mohammed, on the left, I'm still in touch with. He's now living in Agadez, Niger. More focused on his animals now as tourism has dried up. Is active with a co-op promoting local goods, leather work and bijouterie, into Europe.
20/5/20

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

ok. Still not convinced.

How do I get updates? If I follow Jordan and Hard News (I am a breast man) do I get something come through on my phone everytime they post a pointless statement about rubbing lotion on their boobs (HN) or what the latest Nighthawks result is (Jordan)? If so, that means if I am following hundreds of people, my phone will be going like the clappers. If it is only checking on the website, then I can do that without having to go through the hassle of having to create an account and show the world that only 4 people are interested in what I am doing.

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

You only get texts if you say you want them.

And yeah true,but you'd have to search,then look in the profiles individually. Whereas if you signed up and followed them,it'd be Om one newsfeed.

I had the same thoughts about it before I signed up. I still kind of do find it mostly pointless,but it is good for some things.

Allegedly

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

I've only had twitter about 3 months & dont have it going to my phone but i always have it running in the background at work and find things like traffic reports and storm warnings fairly useful. I also follow things like Nasa (tho thats now kind of redundant) and CERN and Happy Feet cause sheesh one needs to know if a penguin is about to take a swim

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

and there is my problem - Twitter is blocked from work and I only use the home computer for porn and downloading (porn) movies.

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

twitter is blocked frm my work too - thats what proxy servers are for. try http://hidemyass.com/

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Ahh proxies, sweet sweet proxies.

Central Hawkes Bay Nix
and tragic follower of Charlton Athletic

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

It's pretty good for 'breaking news' and the likes. I follow the likes of BBC, Sky News, Sky Sports News, Phoenix, Hibs etc etc.

You can also watch funny (and regular) slanging matches between Piers Morgan, Wayne Rooney etc.

And, you could probably become a tabloid journo in the UK as they appear to get all their stories from Twitter these days!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qe_B5CzbTJo - Caceres winning penalty v Perth - footage from the Fever Zone

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Steve-O wrote:

It's pretty good for 'breaking news' and the likes. I follow the likes of BBC, Sky News, Sky Sports News, Phoenix, Hibs etc etc.

ï¿½

You can also watch funny (and regular) slanging matches between Piers Morgan, Wayne Rooney etc.

ï¿½

And, you could probably become a tabloid journo in the UK as they appear to get all their stories from Twitter these days!!

Twitter is the fastest form of news. You get immediate updates, depending if you follow the right people. I know it's the other sport, but Jim Kayes (who is the biggest meat-head in the world) often tweets mid afternoon about his stories on TV3 Sport that night, meaning you dont even need to watch the news!

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Jim kays lol. Reckon he got the job because he's mates with hamish mckay? It's excruciating to watch his stories...guess thats why it's better reading his tweets

Fruglo on 15.01.2013 wrote:

Fuck this stupid game

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

I have decided that if Jessica Ennis is on Twitter, then I will be. It will help to take my stalking to a new level.

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

i like how the internet isn't creepy

Central Hawkes Bay Nix
and tragic follower of Charlton Athletic

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Look, if she didn't want to be stalked by overweight, middle-aged men, she shouldn't have been so hot.

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

too right it's her fault!

Central Hawkes Bay Nix
and tragic follower of Charlton Athletic

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Frankie Mac wrote:

Look, if she didn't want to be stalked by overweight, middle-aged men, she shouldn't have been so hot.

Are you a cop in Canada by any chance?

Allegedly

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Tegal wrote:

Frankie Mac wrote:

Look, if she didn't want to be stalked by overweight, middle-aged men, she shouldn't have been so hot.

Are you a cop in Canada by any chance?

No, but I would like to mountie Jessica Ennis

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Right - I am on twitter then. FrankieMacJones is the name, um........twittering is the game?

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

My mum now follows me on Twitter. To see all the tweating I do.

Central Hawkes Bay Nix
and tragic follower of Charlton Athletic

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Which reminds me... s'pose I should update my sig

E + R + O

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

This twitter malarky is brilliant.

For those of you who do not know what it is, it is a chance to post updates on what you are doing/thinking in 140 characters or less, so people who work in the sex industry can read it

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

Permalink

over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Oh my god, I cannot stop tweeting - this is the greatest thing ever. How come this whole thing was only invented a couple of weeks ago?

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Guy goes into the doctor's and says " I am addicted to Twitter". Doctor replies "sorry, I don't follow you".

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

dairyflat wrote:

Guy goes into the doctor's and says " I am addicted to Twitter". Doctor replies "sorry, I don't follow you".

Somebody had to...

E + R + O

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Using Twitter like a demon, but cannot get people to follow me (stuggling to get to double figures). Without wishing to whore myself too much, how do you actually get people to follow you?

I am sick of looking like a loser in the real world and cyber.

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

Permalink

over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Follow LOTS of people, about half will usually follow back.

Get used to using hashtags, the more you tweet about a certain topic and use the hashtag, more people that also like that topic will follow you. When the season starts again, #aleague is a very good place to start.

Interaction is also key, the more you reply to peoples tweets, its makes it more likely that they (and people they follow) will follow you.

Just a few tips, twitter does take a long time to master (unless you are a celebrity, or Ashton Kutcher).

Yellow Fever - Misery loves company

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Frankie Mac wrote:

Using Twitter like a demon, but cannot get people to follow me (stuggling to get to double figures).ï¿½ Without wishing to whore myself too much, how do you actually get people to follow you?

ï¿½

I am sick of looking like a loser in the real world and cyber.

Just followed you - will throw out a #FF cos it's still Friday there... haha!

E + R + O

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Sorry mate never been to the twitter site before but you look like a retarded 10 year old emo kid from your picture. Amazing

Nice one if you are being ironic or something I dunno but ffs - utter brillance!!!

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

ForteanTimes wrote:

Sorry mate never been to the twitter site before but you look like a retarded 10 year old emo kid from your picture. Amazing

Nice one if you are being ironic or something I dunno but ffs - utter brillance!!!

emo? (I nearly did multiple ????? there, but I know you are not a fan). Really???????? (Sorry)

I was aiming for over-weight, middle-aged crisis, wannabe metro-sexual type. I mean, a purple shirt with a pink collar? How emo is that?

In all honesty, last year I spent about 6 months trying to grow my hair so it would go curly again - it last happened when I was 17. For the entire time, both my wife and my boss complained incessantly about my hair, while everyone else I knew just pretended it just wasn't happening. This is one of the few photos I have of that time, and something I am very proud of. I think it takes some balls to try and deflect attention from a number of very prommnient faults with a strange lid.

Edited to say - just seen the photo again, and you are right - I do look like a c**t.

Frankie Mac2011-08-13 11:08:28

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Also once you start following lots of people/businesses your timeline can get fairly busy so i've found that I quickly tend to stop following those who incessantly tweet their every moment cough*Robb*cough as otherwise you're constantly are getting updated on mundanaties.

My timeline now tends more to give me info re bands, bars, film fest, weather and some humerus stuff from certain celebrities (again I've dropped the ones (George Michael/Mike Tyson) who can't have a sh*t without sharing it). the only people I care about getting daily multiples updates from are really good mates and even then i'm more likely to tease them that they think they are so important the world needs to know they missed their bus
stealthkiwi2011-08-13 18:19:22

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Today I was able to tell Joey Barton he was a cheating erse.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qe_B5CzbTJo - Caceres winning penalty v Perth - footage from the Fever Zone

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over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Double figures bitches.

I am up to 10 followers, which was always my goal. Is that good?

All I do is make the stuff I would've liked
Reference things I wanna watch, reference girls I wanna bite
Now I'm firefly like a burning kite
And yousa fake fuck like a fleshlight

Permalink

over 14 years ago · edited over 13 years ago

Frankie Mac wrote:

Double figures bitches.

I am up to 10 followers, which was always my goal. Is that good?

Middle-age and 10 (now 11) notches on your bed post.

Keep trying.

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