Internal Dilemma

I have a problem and would like some advice (and who better to ask than my YF Family???)

Next week it is my birthday. My partner has bought me a gift after me specifying on many occassions that I dont want any gifts. I know what it is because I spotted the purchase on our joint credit card account. The gift is something that I said once that I quite like but would really never consider getting for myself.

I know that I should be grateful for this gift but how can I tell her that I really dont like them enough to want to own one myself?

A few suggestions:

- Break up with her before your birthday

- Tell her you've got to go overseas on secondment for a few months and live downstairs at the Four Kings until it all blows over.

- Travel back in time and stop yourself from telling her you'd quite like it.

(PS: I'm currently single)

Just be honest. Pretty simple. 

Unsure which out of honesty or lying is least likely to result in me not being physically harmed by my own birthday "surprise"...

You may have worked out by now that it isnt a bottle of scotch or a case of red wine!

Sounds like she wants to get you a birthday present.

Ask her to return what she has bought you (explaining why) and give her a suggestion for some other present you would find more useful.

Liverpool is nice in May.

Be appreciative of her effort.

As Leggy says be honest.

You can sell Harley Davidsons on Trademe

I am now wishing it was a Harley after the response I received this morning. At least by now I would be riding away from trouble ?

Be honest they said. Lying is bad they said...

Just appreciate the gift, and be happy that your partner cares enough to recall something you said once. She's clearly thought about it - as it's something you've said you'd like. How many times do people say they don't want anything but them moan to their friends that they go shafted cos people listened?

Is it a dog?

my suggestion is you both get individual credit cards for your next birthday

Accept it in good graciousness dude. I wish that one day my wife would buy me a present, whether it be my birthday or Christmas. You're lucky! 

Right, I think I have got this.

360-odd days of the year if I ask for something to be done, or this case not done, and it happens anyway, I have the right to be irate.

On days, such as Christmas, Birthdays, Easter, Valentines etc this rule does not apply?

So I have to suck it up even though my specific request when asked about what might like for my birthday was "no presents and no fuss" in order  not to hurt the feelings of someone who quite clearly didnt follow instruction?

Yes, suck it up. She means well, be grateful.

I suppose I can pretend it is a Kookaburra and not a Kotare

Yes, this seems about right! Giving presents to loved ones on such occasions is quite ingrained for many people usually from childhood or just society in general. For many people, giving presents can be more enjoyable than receiving presents. In a way it can actually be a bit selfish to refuse someone the opportunity to be able to give if they want to.

Also you are partly stitched up here by the people who say they don't want a present out of some sort of politeness/modesty, when they actually do want a present and get disappointed if their request is granted. People learn from that not to heed such instructions.

Valentine's Day I see as a bit different from the main ones... I'd often rather do nothing, but generally compromise by suggesting how about we can do something but 'keep it low key'. 

Jeez, it is just a small thing. Smile, say thanks, put it away and forget about it.

Counter move: buy her a book about minimalism as a gift. My wife and I have stopped buying each other 'stuff' and only buy things that we know the other really wants or needs, otherwise we'll spend money on an experience