Football United - July 2014 West Ham and Newcastle visit

Marquee
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almost 15 years

ForteanTimes wrote:

Tegal wrote:

paulm wrote:

patrick478 wrote:

"The twins, Linda and Jools will be in their “Ken & Ken” characters as well as “Camp Mother and Camp Leader” as they conduct spot interviews, sing to the crowd and provide an alternative ‘commentary’ to the ‘beautiful game”."

tell me this doesn't mean they're going to be on the loudspeaker during the game

please

This would probably cause me to leave and go watch it in a bar somewhere. 

It would probably make LG explode like a 50 megaton bomb if they did - he gets pretty angsty about folk abusing the loud speaker.

i hope they spend plenty of time down by his aisle :)

This. He has missed out for years on all the giveaways and Nixie.  He can have Linda and Jools sitting either side of him all game!

Head Sleuth
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over 17 years
Marquee
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about 12 years

The Topp Twins...

Generally Welnix i think have made smart decisions but whoever came up with this idea is an idiot!! How are they family friendly, if your not over 50 who gives a shit about them and still cares what they do on tv.

I'd rather have Jason Gunn!!

Marquee
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about 12 years

They should have gone for Paul Henry.

I'd watch him... if only to see who he shits on first... as opposed to watching the Topp Twins who will just be shit!

WeeNix
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950
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about 13 years

Worlds cannot describe what I am feeling right now

Leeeeeeeeeeeeeeegend
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about 17 years

Saturday double-header - I have one spare kids ticket in the Zone available - prefer face value for it - $36.

Anyone???

WeeNix
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over 12 years

Chelski Liz wrote:

Saturday double-header - I have one spare kids ticket in the Zone available - prefer face value for it - $36.

Anyone???

Throw in a Topp Twins CD and I'll think about it.

a.k.a AJ13
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almost 15 years

Tegal wrote:
Actually, typical homophobic and 'soccer is gay' comments coming from a rugby boofhead on the nix Facebook page in the comments announcing this. Feel free to track him down on bookface and let him know how much of an idiot he is. Or share it around.

Problem solved - I just fed him childish insults about being a bogan from wanganui with shit tattoos, posted something every time he replied, then deleted all my posts. He was just left with this string of his own comments looking like a complete dipshit, so deleted the post. 

Now you can edit it out of your one on here. It never happened lol

WeeNix
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about 13 years

Or you can not comment because everybody knows he is a moron. Commenting just makes you look equally as stupid.

Still Believin'
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over 17 years

Gonna swim against the tide here and say I don't see what the problem is.

I mean, people do understand this event is basically the 7s by another name don't they? The short-list for this was probably the Austin Powers impersonator, Frankie Stevens and The Topp Twins.

And while The Topp Twins ain't really my type of humour, having seen their doco I think they are a couple of very cool ladies so all power to them.

That said, booking The Topp Twins to MC this is exactly my type of humour. It's so bizarre it's brilliant. I love stuff out of left field.

At least they didn't book The Feelers or Six 60.

a.k.a AJ13
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almost 15 years

threatD wrote:

Or you can not comment because everybody knows he is a moron. Commenting just makes you look equally as stupid.

Key word: delete.

a.k.a AJ13
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almost 15 years

terminator_x wrote:

Gonna swim against the tide here and say I don't see what the problem is.

I mean, people do understand this event is basically the 7s by another name don't they? The short-list for this was probably the Austin Powers impersonator, Frankie Stevens and The Topp Twins.

And while The Topp Twins ain't really my type of humour, having seen their doco I think they are a couple of very cool ladies so all power to them.

That said, booking The Topp Twins to MC this is exactly my type of humour. It's so bizarre it's brilliant. I love stuff out of left field.

At least they didn't book The Feelers or Six 60.

Can't say I've ever made a comparison between the two. 

WeeNix
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960
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about 11 years

Tegal wrote:

Jeff Vader wrote:

Maybe someone has said

"How do we get those fucking old blazer brigade munter Lion Red drinking rugby head types to watch this? I know - The Topp Twins!!"

Actually, typical homophobic and 'soccer is gay' comments coming from a rugby boofhead on the nix Facebook page in the comments announcing this. Feel free to track him down on bookface and let him know how much of an idiot he is. Or share it around. 

lol, i learnt in psychology most people who are this homophobic tend to be aroused by the same sex.

LG
Legend
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about 17 years

1 The Topp Twinns are about as funny as a fart in an elevator or napier phoenix.

2 When Nix fans give them the luke warm reception they deserve, they will probably call the game soccer just to get a reaction and take the piss.

3 Visiting fans should be asked not to judge all New Zealanders by these two.

4 If you want to hear me scream in pain, let them yoddle which went out of date in the days of Tex Morton way back in the early 70s. Younger fans can read up about him on Wiki.

5 Why not wheel out Max Cryer and the children and give everyone the complete going over. Again, younger fans can find out about that entertainment from the very early 70s.

6 I have never seen so many YF users in such agreement.

7 Who really did come up with this idea? Come back Dane Rumble, all is forgiven...well almost.

Marquee
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about 17 years

Let's hope that great piece with Winston Reid on Campbell Live tonight does some good.

Legend
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almost 16 years

I don't give a rat's arse about any of this, but in the spirit of YF togetherness-mob rule, how about we burn their effigies?

#burnbindiandharold

Chant Savant
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over 17 years

i think we should arrange to do a duet with the Sydney fans.

Im thinking Total Eclipse of the Heart.

Who's in?

Opinion Privileges revoked
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almost 15 years

Great, now I've got an image of the Topp Twins yodelling "Total Eclipse of the Heart".

WeeNix
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over 12 years

Do they really need an MC?  It's two games of football FFS.  Just need someone to announce the teams and sponsors.

WeeNix
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over 14 years

Sky news just tweeted that two of the people on the MH17 flight were Newcastle fans on their way here. So sad.

LG
Legend
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about 17 years

Now that is sad to hear. Minutes silence in respect I reckon.

Starting XI
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over 14 years

That is terrible. They should defiantly do something at all the games to acknowledge those who lost their lives

Starting XI
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about 16 years

patrick478 wrote:

And the Phoenix find the only possible way for me to feel less excited about the double header:

English Premier League teams and fans will be treated to a true taste of Kiwi when New Zealand entertainers, The Topp Twins host the Football United Tour’s double –header at Wellington’s Westpac Stadium on July 26th

http://www.footballaustralia.com.au/wellingtonphoe...

The cringe will be running high:

"The twins, Linda and Jools will be in their “Ken & Ken” characters as well as “Camp Mother and Camp Leader” as they conduct spot interviews, sing to the crowd and provide an alternative ‘commentary’ to the ‘beautiful game”."

I bet you professional Cockney Miles Davis will be involved with the Auckland game v West Ham. Suddenly he seems like one of our best entertainers compared to the Topp Twins.

Must try harder
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over 17 years

Miles " Guvnor " Davis ....better than the Topp twins ?

I didnt even know that the Topps were dead ...

Must try harder
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over 17 years

Still , as long as they get that nice Devlin boy to yabber  away Ill be happy ....

Starting XI
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about 16 years

JarrodM wrote:

Sky news just tweeted that two of the people on the MH17 flight were Newcastle fans on their way here. So sad.

News reports in UK identifying the two fans killed. One had been here in 1985 following Newcastle. This major Newcastle newspaper suggests fans leave condolences and tributes in the comments beneath the article:

http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/news/north-east-new...

"John Alder, known to fans as John ‘The Undertaker’, is believed to have been making his way to New Zealand to watch the Magpies in their pre-season tour.

John, of Gateshead, believed to be in his 60s, was well-known among Toon fans as he always wore a suit to the game.

The Toon fan has only ever missed one game since 1973 and travels to every away match. He has been to America, Thailand and New Zealand to watch his beloved team..."

Marquee
740
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5.2K
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about 17 years

terminator_x wrote:

Gonna swim against the tide here and say I don't see what the problem is.

I mean, people do understand this event is basically the 7s by another name don't they? The short-list for this was probably the Austin Powers impersonator, Frankie Stevens and The Topp Twins.

And while The Topp Twins ain't really my type of humour, having seen their doco I think they are a couple of very cool ladies so all power to them.

That said, booking The Topp Twins to MC this is exactly my type of humour. It's so bizarre it's brilliant. I love stuff out of left field.

At least they didn't book The Feelers or Six 60.

ffs stop trying to be the cool outre kid and grab a pitchfork like everyone else.

Stage Punch
2.1K
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11K
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about 17 years

Big Pete 65 wrote:

JarrodM wrote:

Sky news just tweeted that two of the people on the MH17 flight were Newcastle fans on their way here. So sad.

News reports in UK identifying the two fans killed. One had been here in 1985 following Newcastle. This major Newcastle newspaper suggests fans leave condolences and tributes in the comments beneath the article:

http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/news/north-east-new...

"John Alder, known to fans as John ‘The Undertaker’, is believed to have been making his way to New Zealand to watch the Magpies in their pre-season tour.

John, of Gateshead, believed to be in his 60s, was well-known among Toon fans as he always wore a suit to the game.

The Toon fan has only ever missed one game since 1973 and travels to every away match. He has been to America, Thailand and New Zealand to watch his beloved team..."

 

Have set up a separate thread for this. It will become THE story of the week, and rightly so. 

But let's keep one thread for the football and the other for memorialising these poor blokes.

LG
Legend
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about 17 years

They just got a mention on talksport in the UK.

Marquee
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over 17 years

this is hilarious.

The Topp Twins obviously...........not the plane crash and deaths.

Starting XI
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about 16 years

NEWCASTLE SQUAD FOR NZ: WHAT WE KNOW SO FAR: BRINGING ONLY 15 OUTFIELD PLAYERS

No official announcement by NUFC as yet of the squad a day out from leaving. But you can safely ignore most of what David Dome at the Phoenix has been saying about it. Here's what we know from the UK media and Newcastle statements:

Newcastle official video preview of tour with interviews (8 mins):

http://www.nufc.co.uk/articles/20140718/nufctv-fre...

Assistant manager of West Ham Neil McDonald toured here with Newcstle in 1985 as a player and has an uncle in Christchurch.

Rob Elliot (ex-Charlton - my team !!!) likely in goal. Ireland international these days.  

Pretty lightweight team with a handful of first choice players but a couple of decent new young signings up front: they are bringing Ayoze Perez a 20 year old striker from Tenerife (16 goals in 34 games in Spain's second div. last season)and Emmanuel Riviere another new striker from Monaco who scored 10 goals last season in Ligue 1.

http://www.shieldsgazette.com/sport/football/newca...  

Ben Arfa, Marveaux and Bigirimana left out of Newcastle squad

NEWCASTLE United were set to today fly to New Zealand – without Hatem Ben Arfa and Sylvain Marveaux.

Alan Pardew is taking a 17-man squad to the country for the Football United Tour 2014.

Newcastle will play games against Sydney FC and Wellington Phoenix next week.

Ben Arfa and Marveaux – who have trained with the club’s development squad since reporting back for pre-season – will be left behind, but they won’t play for the Under-21s against Gateshead at the International Stadium tonight (7.30pm kick-off).

The club’s World Cup players – and new signings Remy Cabella and Daryl Janmaat – won’t travel, and the Gazette understands Shane Ferguson and Gael Bigirimama did not make the squad.

However, forward Emmanuel Riviere – who joined the club from Monaco this week – will travel along with fellow new signings Siem de Jong and Jack Colback.

The absence of Ben Arfa and Marveaux from the squad list is not a surprise, with the pair available for transfer after falling out of favour at St James’s Park last season.

Montpellier – who sold Cabella to Newcastle last week – are believed to be interested in taking midfielder Marveaux on loan, while a report in France claimed a Ukrainian side had made a bid for Ben Arfa, who reported back for training overweight.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

http://www.thejournal.co.uk/sport/football/transfe...

"Remy Cabella will also join up with his team-mates when they return from New Zealand, along with Tim Krul, Moussa Sissoko and Cheick Tiote.

These players may make an appearance against Sheffield Wednesday at Hillsborough on July 30, before the full squad travel to Germany where they will face Malaga and Schalke 04 in the first weekend in August."

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

http://www.themag.co.uk/the-mag-articles/alan-pard...

"Indeed, when the trip down under was announced, the following provisional Newcastle squad was put out into the media in New Zealand/Australia to stimulate interest;

Krul, Alnwick, Elliot, Dummett, Mapou, Santon, Tavernier, Haidara, Williamson, Steven Taylor, Debuchy, Coloccini, Colback, Ferguson, Sammy Ameobi, Bigirimana, Obertan, Marveaux, Ben Arfa, Jonas, Gouffran, Anita, Tiote, Perez, Armstrong, Campbell

Out of that squad we can now assume that Krul, Debuchy, Tiote and Sissoko won’t be competing due to World Cup involvement and of course Debuchy leaving anyway, while this week Remy Cabella confirmed he wasn’t going to New Zealand either.

Jonas is obviously out in the cold and unwanted, not even seen at the training ground so far this pre season, while Marveux and Ben Arfa are reported to be training with the kids. Papiss Cisse and Davide Santon on the other hand are out injured and will miss the start of the season.

So working out which ‘stars’ are left who could be likely to wow our southern hemisphere hosts, I’m guessing possible travellers are Steven Taylor, Coloccini and Gouffran, plus the possibility of new signings Jack Colback and Siem De Jong potentially making the trip.

As Kevin Keegan once famously said about Newcastle United (and John Hall’s patter), ‘It’s not like what it said in the brochure!”

The Newcastle team that lost 2-1 to Oldham Wednesday morning NZT with new signing Siem de Jong scoring on debut.

http://www.nufc.co.uk/articles/20140715/oldham-ath...

Newcastle team v Oldham: Newcastle United (4-2-3-1): Jak Alnwick; Vurnon Anita (Lubo Satka 55), Steven Taylor (Remie Streete 63), Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa, Paul Dummett (Gael Bigirimana 70); Mehdi Abeid, Jack Colback;Yoan Gouffran (Sammy Ameobi 46), Siem De Jong (c) (Haris Vuckic 63), Rolando Aarons (Massadio Haidara 63); Adam Armstrong (Ayoze Perez 55)

Sub not used: Freddie Woodman

Not a lot of name players in that line-up...

"At left-back, Pardew’s plans have been disrupted by Davide Santon’s latest injury. The Italian has a history of knee problems and will miss the entire pre-season as he undergoes rehabilitation."

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Only about five of Newcastle's touring party will probably be in the starting XI for the first EPL game in August:

http://news.ladbrokes.com/en-gb/football/premier-l...

Starting XI
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about 16 years

WEST HAM SQUAD IS MORE STRAIGHTFORWARD AND CLOSE TO FULL STRENGTH:

Pretty much can field a lineup they could use in the EPL:

https://nz.sports.yahoo.com/football/a-league/news...

West Ham United: Kevin Nolan (captain), Mark Noble (vice captain), Winston Reid, Aaron Cresswell, James Tomkins, Matt Jarvis, Cheikhou Kouyate, Andy Carroll, Mauro Zarate, Stewart Downing, Ricardo Vaz Te, Adrian, Jey O’Brien. James Collins, Guy Demel, Diego Poyet, Carlton Cole, Daniel Potts, Sam Howes, Daniel Whitehead, Matthias Fanimo, Leo Chambers.

Included in their squad is All Whites captain Winston Reid as well as established stars in Andy Carroll, Kevin Nolan, Mark Noble, Carlton Cole, Stewart Downing, Ricardo Vaz Te and Jussi Jaaskelainen.

West Ham manager Sam Allardyce has been given significant funds in the transfer window to bolster his squad ahead of the 14/15 Premier League and many of these will on show for the first time in New Zealand.

This includes Argentinian Mauro Zarate who was top scorer in Argentina Primera League last season, Diego Poyet a 19 year old midfielder signed from Charlton Athletic and Cheikhou Kouyate, a 24 box to box midfielder from Anderlecht.

Morrison, Maiga and Valencia are three names missing from the trip.

A recent Charlton player Diego Poyet (son of Gus) in the squad (Newcastle are bringing former Charlton goalie Rob Elliot).

It was All White vs. All White in the Hammers first pre-season outing midweek in a 0-0 draw with Tommy Smith's Ipswich at Portman Road:

http://www.whufc.com/articles/20140716/ft-ipswich-...

A different side fielded in each half.

Big Sam and skipper Kevin Nolan interviewed at Heathrow on departure for NZ:

Hammers depart for New Zealand YOU TUBE

Some of the younger players arrived in Auckland yesterday with the advance party:

West Ham United FC ✔ @whufc_official

Follow

NEW ZEALAND: @dannywhiteheadd, @MFanimo40 and Sam Howes are in Auckland already! #WHUNZ

Marquee
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7.3K
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over 17 years

Big Pete 65 wrote:

WEST HAM SQUAD IS MORE STRAIGHTFORWARD AND CLOSE TO FULL STRENGTH:

that is because none of our squad went to the World Cup

LG
Legend
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24K
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about 17 years
Opinion Privileges revoked
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almost 15 years

Lonegunmen wrote:

She's hot.

Which one, the one on the left or the right?

Chant Savant
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over 17 years

Turn around, every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming round...

Must try harder
96
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over 17 years

Down Linda !

Down Jools !

LG
Legend
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about 17 years

We need a PMSL button as well as the thumbs up.

First Team Squad
500
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about 17 years

AJ13 wrote:

Tegal wrote:
Actually, typical homophobic and 'soccer is gay' comments coming from a rugby boofhead on the nix Facebook page in the comments announcing this. Feel free to track him down on bookface and let him know how much of an idiot he is. Or share it around.

Problem solved - I just fed him childish insults about being a bogan from wanganui with shit tattoos, posted something every time he replied, then deleted all my posts. He was just left with this string of his own comments looking like a complete dipshit, so deleted the post. 

Now you can edit it out of your one on here. It never happened lol

i am a bogan from wanganui with tattoos(not shit ones though) i feel slightly insulted by that comment, are you sure he is not from some other hick town.

Heaven knows I'm miserable now
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about 16 years

General consensus on Tony Veitch Facebook comments is that it's too expensive.

Sales for Auckland in particular suggest that is indeed the case. Figures of $80 - $100 quoted on there? Is that correct?

I just bought tickets to Germany v Scotland in the Euro Championship qualifier in Dortmund - $100 NZD, and that was a mid-level ticket.

Football United - July 2014 West Ham and Newcastle visit

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