I know you guys are feeling in the dumps, and I hate to pile on, but in all sincerity, I am not sure if the All Whites would have made it into the final round of qualifying (the hex) if you were in Concacaf. If you had, I suspect you would have gone the route of Jamaica. While most of the US fans would have loved to have seen Mexico implode even further, most never seriously thought that they wouldn't make it through to Brazil.
Don't worry about piling it on. Nothing you said was unfair, even if Jamaica had been the 4th team we would have probably still been underdogs against them (although had a much better chance than Mexico). I would only add that the real advantage in being in a bigger qualifying group is that there are so many more meaningful games to help raise the standard. Our preparation this cycle has been pretty bad.
I absolutely agree. The top 6 ranked teams in the region do not enter the qualifying campaign until the third round. The US for example played 6 games in the third round and 10 in the fourth. Combine that with two Gold Cups (Concacaf version of the Euros) between South Africa and Brazil at a minimum of 3 games if you get bounced in the group stage up to 6 per tournament if you reach the final and the USMNT have logged 28 meaningful games since June 2011 against mostly solid competition in addition to at least 8 more games against top quality European competition (not sure how many friendlies we have had in that time). There are a few dogs in their like Guadeloupe, Belize and Antigua and Barbuda, but we also played Mexico, Costa Rica, Honduras and Panama a minimum of three times.
For those that did not enter qualifying ranked in the top 6 (Panama), they had to play another 4 games in the second round to bring them to a potential of 32 competitive games in the same time span. If it were possible, and I don't see FIFA approving it because it would be the death knell for Oceania, New Zealand should definitely make the jump to the AFC. You may not make it through qualification for first few times, but in the long run it would immensely help with your development as a squad. Better competition on a consistent basis is one of the major keys.
Your geographic location is an unfortunate, major detriment as you all have stated that nobody wants to fly down there unless it is a competitive match. The distance between you and Australia is the equivalent distance of a flight from Panama City to Mexico city. In between is Costa Rica, Nicaragua, El Salvador, Honduras, Guatamala and Belize. In addition, that would also land you in Cuba, Jamaica, Trinidad and Tobago, Haiti and Puerto Rico (the top half and historically best teams of Concacaf).